[I am most appreciative for permission to post the following essay. To protect her privacy, Serephina is not the author's real name.]
I first came to GAPS because of two particularly worrying problems, but in addition, I had various other things suggesting to me that my body was not really well as a whole.
For many years I had had, with increasing severity, a condition known as Depersonalisation Syndrome. This can be seen on PET scans, which show that one area of the brain is inactive. The experience of DP for me is that I do not feel awake, but as if I am dreaming, and I have the sense that my brain is not properly comprehending my surroundings, even though I am able to be factually accurate about everything, and to respond to my surroundings in ways that other people find appropriate. Relationships are difficult, since the emotional meaning of situations is difficult to interpret. People and places seem unfamiliar, and I cannot remember how things used to feel when I was well. I don't feel the normal range of emotions, and often feel emotions happening in my body without me connecting to them, as if I am a robot. This experience is frightening and bewildering.